No Love, No Peace

It’s easy to mourn from a distance. It’s easy to be infuriated. It’s not my tradition. It’s not my rights, either to marry or to perform a ceremony that are being abrogated. I am not married because some of you cannot marry, but that was an easy gesture for Steve and me to make; we had no compelling need to marry.

But I’m far sadder than I thought I’d be, both because of the hatefulness and the willingness to allow hate to overshadow their very real responsibilities to Love.

I believe in church. I always have. It is where I have found meaning. It’s true that the meaning I have sought and found has changed over the years. I’m very happy being a Unitarian Universalist for all so many reasons. (you know spell check really should learn to recognize Universalism as a religion and stop telling me I’m wrong!)

But this is where I have immigrated, it isn’t where I was raised. That was sweet and wonderful time for me that eventually didn’t hold the meaning I needed. We held my sister’s memorial in the church we grew up in, and it was clear that that may not have been the best choice theologically, although it was an emotional tie. Too long gone. And way too much theological distance between us.

My early tradition taught me to choose Love. And when I did. When I realized that I would have to grow or lose the friends who were discovering or uncovering their sexuality, I chose Love. This may have been my first step into adulthood (the first step out of Eden?). I danced in and out of that garden gate for a while and eventually left.

And now it seems barbaric to waste time, energy and resources fighting about people’s Love (a pastor’s for his congregation, a father’s for his son, a son’s for his husband) and not about real injustice. Jesus never enjoined folk to hate. “Do you love me, feed my children.”

This year more Americans are going to go hungry. It seems people who style themselves as religious ought to be worrying about that.

I’m sorry for my clergy friends in other traditions who are living with these limitations. I pray for your finding your way forward. I’m sorrier for the differently-loving that you are told, over and over again, that your Love is not worthy. Those who tell you that are flat wrong. My prayers are with you all.

And I’m really, really sorry, that too many of today’s mainline churches would rather pick nits than do justice… and in the name of nit-picking commit sad and sorry injustice.

Autumn Peace Swimming

I love swimming. You can’t have read these for long and not have gotten clear about that. And swimming out of doors, whether in a creek, the ocean or a pool. The best. But swimming anywhere? I’ll take it.

The pool where I swim in the winter is in a room on the end of the building, windows all around. No matter what’s going on outside, the water remains a cozy 84˚. The air is even more balmy (unless you get too close to the doors on a winter’s day.). Sometimes I get to the pool in the afternoons and it’s empty except for the guard and I do my work out chatting with Tara and enjoying nature. It’s wonderful. Oh, look, there’s an eagle. Funny that wind last night didn’t take all the leaves off that tree…

But it’s also wonderful in the early mornings, when the pool’s open before class. The ladies come drifting in for their stretching and aerobics classes. It’s such a delight to hear them chatter. Catching up on their days, talking of bargains, of plants and old friends. Giggling. Comfortable in their bodies and in their lives. Grumbling a bit about the inconveniences, but present. Showing up to life and the moment. Counting their blessings and sharing them with the person next to them and the one across the circle.

May I be such a one. Swimming still. Reveling in the full-bodied embrace of water on flesh. Enjoying my friends and the morning gathering. Life is still rich and they’re generous with stories and lessons and laughter. Ah… Keeps me going back because this is the exercise that feels most like joy to me. And that makes the exercise sacred for me. Joy in my body. Joy in my heart. Peace in my mind and soul. It doesn’t get better than this for me.

Candlelit Peace

I don’t know what it is that candles do for me… or rather I know what, but I don’t know why.

OK, throw that all out. I know that sitting in a room with lit candles calms me. I also know that when I light them with intention, that I might be present, that I might be calmed, that I might appreciate the beauty of where I am (where I live!) and the gift of the dark.

Now as I mourn my sister’s passing. I create a small, quiet, beautifully lit oasis so that I might sit in contemplation.

To give myself that Peace, I must make my space beautiful, a place I want to be… The whole process helps, and indulges the luxury of time and of being exactly how I am, feeling what I feel and feeling wonderful in the midst of it.

I love the sweetness of the dark for all it offers me… May you find comfort in the dark as well. May we leave those sweet oases with Peace on our hearts and go back into the world as its envoys.

Autumn Sabbath Peace

Here where I am, it’s a warm, foggy rainy morning. Watch out, it’ll be slippery underfoot, thanks to all the leaves lying about on sidewalks (really, i could have swept!).

Pretty soon, I’ll get up and get ready for church, but I’m enjoying a few last minutes cozy in my living room, writing to you. I’m preaching about my reluctance to claim myself publicly as a minister. Odd. I adore my work, yet somehow can’t be all braggy about it. I guess I’m just tired of the role churches play and don’t play in the world. so, i’m practicing… Say, did you know I’m the minister of a small, lovely, involved UU congregation. Yep, I am.

Last evening’s walk was gorgeous. Every sense got called to attention. It was a good reminder that every season has moments that call to us. It’s too easy to complain about Fall that turns to Winter. When we do that, we skip right over the beauty each season, each day, even each moment can offer.

The moon was so big and the moment so perfect it was easy to put things into perspective. This is a vast and wonderful world, and I am a very small pilgrim on its crust. Still, in the midst of finding my place, I could feel the world pushing me to speak out, speak up. For Peace. For the Earth. For the Web. (Really, do other people get to just crunch through the leaves and not think about this stuff? I sure do get caught on the meaning!) Here I am: one little flyspeck for Peace, overcome with the Beauty and Abundance.

But as June Jordan reminded us: “We do what we can, more than that, what can anyone ask?” So, today, on this misty Autumn Sabbath, enjoy the moment and speak up for Life. Speak out for Peace.

Peace Connections

I don’t think connections via technology are easy unless you work hard at the discipline of connection. That said, they have all the possibilities (and many of pitfalls) of F2F (I couldn’t help myself, face-to-face) conversations.

After yesterday’s musing, I called my friend Lorraine. Our lives have been more apart than together, and yet our friendship has been foundational to both our lives since it started 44 years ago. When we get to be together, sure there’s catching up to do, but mostly it’s about refamiliarizing ourselves with one another’s physical presences… noticing how we’re aging. We’ve been apart during one another’s cancers and the deaths of our parents. But we’ve never really been far from one another. The telephone, the internet, and maybe facebook (because Lorraine is slow and cautious on FB) are what we have. To label it “not enough” would mean that we would have to let go of the friendship. Because I’m probably not moving to Sweden any time soon and she’s probably not moving to Lewisburg.

So it is what it is. We have what we have, and we can revel in it, or release it. Nope. not letting go.

Here in Central PA, there are religious sects who refuse technology because they feel it interrupts community. One the one hand, I completely understand what they’re talking about. They live slowly. Chores are shared and lives are lived in tandem. (and from what you see at market, there’s no shortage of cake!). I understand the allure of such a life, but for me, that’s a harkening back to the past. I’ve always been more interested in figuring out how to bring the past into where we are. Because you can’t really stuff progress back into a bottle. It happens and it’s both enriched and impoverished life.

But it’s up to us, it seems to keep it rich, isn’t it? So If FB or Skype or even that old telephone is what we have, let’s use it. Let’s enjoy one another. Understanding the importance of friends and friends everywhere, allows us to make more friends. It allows us to stay connected. Cherishing those connections hopefully helps us keep reaching out.

One of the telephone companies’ ad used to be “Reach out and touch someone.” Yes, indeed. Do that very thing. Call one another consciously. How do you stretch your circle? How do you convince yourself to make time for Peace? Because Peace is a slow process.

We need to make the space. We need to use the tools available. The world depends on us. So does Peace — slow, connected Peace.

Eat, Drink Peace Pause

Fika. ahhhh. The memories were so sweet, I had to call my friend Lorraine today, who is a champeen fika person. Any place you go, you pack along a few snacks worthy of a pause. Or you go to the bakery. Or, or, or.

This is a woman with whom I’ve sat in countless bakeries, laughing and laughing and crying and crying and fixing life with a cup of tea and a sweet. (And the Swedes are pretty circumspect about size… they haven’t reached supersizing as a national pastime yet.) But mostly it was at home sitting around on the couch with a sandwich. It’s the food. But it’s the pause that really warms the heart.

It was an interesting notion to think that a cup of tea or coffee was a communal event. Apparently offices have their pause at the same time, and people gather. They don’t guzzle liquid and stuff food at their desks, they stop. and talk to one another. Productivity goes up. (the US has all those studies, but we don’t believe them.) But a tiny moment of détente in the middle of the day? Priceless.

Believing you’re important enough to stop and take a moment to relax, to regather yourself, vital to your well being and to your work. Fika: the pause that refreshes. Fika: a pause that gives sweet moments of Peace and maybe inspires movement in the Peace direction!

Peace Companions

I live in the most extraordinary place. But then, so do you. It’s simply a matter of paying attention.

Since beginning this year on Peace, searching the headlines and searching my soul, I’ve seen many different and wonderful things. They were probably there before. I just wasn’t seeing them because I wasn’t looking. My facebook connections have morphed, deepened. Sure there are lots of fun and fluffy posts. Nothing wrong with that. I’m a fun and fluffy Gurl myself… There’s a reason I wanted to name my TV show: Sister Fluff and the Goddess Gospel Hour. I think we’ve overlooked the value of silly laughter and that silly laughter can leave us entrees into the more profound. There’s even lots of stupid, hateful stuff on FB, but I see a lot less of it now that I’m posting consistently about Peace.

Is FB the right place to post about Peace? Yesterday I heard a talking head say there’s something like 7 billion people on FB and one in 7 (again, these are sorta numbers, because I can’t even remember where I heard these, but a WHOLE LOTTA FOLKS are on FB… and if we start spreading our peace posts out. If we start reposting our friends’ wisdom when we encounter it, we can sweeten the pot, deepen the flavor. Some people would say cheapen… that FB is too glib. That’s not my experience.

Here’s my experience: I see more people who are doing great work. I see more people who are posting about things that matter. I see fewer people who are only worried about money or hate. I see people stretching out. I know there are people following me, the professional me, not the personal me (although they’re pretty related) who don’t agree with lots of what i think, yet who encourage me to post my peace dreams. They’ve reached out during my grieving.

I believe we all have dreams of Peace. We just need to encourage one another. Peace gets made in little ways as well as large. We’re in charge of the little ones. Let’s get going. (and let’s make sure we stop for a cuppa, because that always makes the journey more fun.) The community is larger than we think.

Out of Fear, Peace

It’s the only place Peace can come from. Because it’s the place too many of us dwell, too much of the time. So let’s just admit it and start building Peace here.

We are frightened and it is not without cause. People are doing fearsome stuff. People have always done fearsome stuff. Is it worse now? Are we simply reading about it more? It seems worse. It seems as if folks are more callous (read more frightened). Horrible things are happening. We can do what people do and throw up our hands. Bury ourselves in the distractions today’s world offers.

Or we can commit. And as the prayer says “Begin again in love.” Or as we’d say over here at Sacred Village, “Begin again in Peace.”

All we have is Peace and one another. Life will always take lives, and accidents will happen. But in those sacred places in between, we can make Peace. Exhausting, exhilarating Peace. Peace be with you. Peace be you.

Veteran Peace

This holiday was always important to me, because I believed my older sister when she told me the world was not working because it was her birthday. She was an anchor in my world, so why would that not be true?

Once a year, people pull out the red, white and blue and say “Say Thank You!” And why not? Those people in harm’s way?

But it’s not an easy thank you for a woman who wishes the world were working on Peace not on controlling properties. It’s not easy when I think about who gets sent to fight wars, who wouldn’t have health care for their families without their service and who spends their lives avoiding anything like service.

It’s not easy to listen to politicians extol the value of the military and watch them cut services to Veterans. Something like 85 percent of our homeless are former military. There are huge negative impacts to “serving” the country, soldiers are discouraged from seeking help that should be part of service. Living in the line of fire and killing people, even people you believe are evil who may in fact be evil… these things are not good for your soul. The physical extremes they endure mess with their bodies and their minds.

So my Veteran’s Day prayers are mixed. I pray in thanksgiving for those who returned and those who sacrificed. Those who made difficult moral decisions to serve in other ways. I pray that we make a different homecoming for those who served, that we demand better for them of our leaders and ourselves, that we make a space and a place, that we fight for their Peace as they volunteered to fight for ours… I pray that we begin to speak up, act up, think up about ways to promote Peace… not to avoid war… but to move toward the joyous possibilities. I pray we will be kind to one another we who are on such different sides of this confusion. I will pray for the safety of the men and women (no longer boys and girls) in service and that their sweet and beating hearts may never have to take another’s life.

And in the midst of it all on this Armistice Day, this remembrance of the War to End All Wars that Ended Nothing…

I also remember that it is my sister’s birthday. And she is no longer with me. And my heart is still tender with loss.

Let there be Peace on Earth and let it begin with me. Let there be Gratitude as well.

Food, Peace, Sabbath

Yesterday, my church had a casino fundraiser for a project that puts food in backpacks to keep children from going hungry on weekends when they’re out of school. It’s a great project and a great community building event — an all around win. In the county where this is working up to 70% of the kids qualify for free or reduced lunch. What does it mean that our children are hungry? What does it say about us as a culture, as a country?

We had great food for sale to support food for backpacks. For a little casino, we raised a lot of money. We’ve had to breathe deeply and decide to dig deeply this year. People will hunger. There are certainly political responses to that, and they may differ, although I’m not always sure why they should. But the religious response should always be to feed the hungry. The Dalai Lama holds that at the center of every religion is Compassion. Let us therefore care for one another.

It was lovely to leave that event and get invited home to new friends to meet their friends and to be fed the food of the gods… and to leave that event with a check for the first event.

Today I’ll spend at church (still cracks me up!) talking with folk who are finding their church home and later making my home homier and designing better space for eating at home. We all need food at home. Food may be part of what defines home. I’m lousy at that, yet I can work to get better. and as I do, I’ll be in prayer about ways to think about food at everyone’s house. So I invite you to spend some of this precious Sabbath thinking about food at home: yours and everyone’s. Gotta run and make breakfast before church…

Together we can be the difference in the world.

Sacred Village

Building a World of Peace, Village by Sacred Village.

The Priestess Is In