Serendipitous Peace, llvl

What are the odds. On the right street, at the right time. Just two minutes either way and my friends from six hours away would never have seen us walking into the parking lot behind the house. The two couples had met four years ago when Bengt and Titti came north to Lorraine and Kjell’s stuga to meet Steve and me. So much fun.

I hadn’t told any friends on the other side of Sweden I was coming. The travel is too much. Sweden is, after all a big country… and after the train problems I just described, It’s not as easy as it should be! And it all seemed pretty safe. It was not as if I was going to run into anyone, right?

But there we were. Off all the towns on all the streets, they had to have had lunch at that restaurant and finished at exactly the right time. Lorraine and I were just coming home from sending home a package and there they were. We jumped around a bit, hugged a lot and took them home for tea and coffee. We jammed a weekend’s worth of catching up on four years into an hour. We laughed. We cried. We hugged some more. And they got into their car and drove away.

It could not have been a sweeter encounter. And how serendipitous. Forty-five years of love, running into itself on a small street in a small town far away. This woman knew and loved my family and in that odd way of Exchange Students she is my family. Sometimes Peace is the sweetest of surprises!

Regular Peace, llvl

It’s nice, after lots of wonderful visits, to have some slow and “normal” days. Normal, at least, in their lives. Normal in the times I have been with them. Nothing sweeter or more intimate than to live beyond guest-hood and be invited into the life where projects are completed, trips to the hardware store are undertaken, where life is at is…

Looking at Deb Slade’s photo made me realize that they live one block from the river and one block from downtown. I live two blocks from the river and one block from downtown. Beauty and convenience at our fingertips… So their normal is somewhat familiar, although their two young men, one who’s arrived home and one who comes home on Friday are not MY normal. But fun and wonderful men, nonetheless… and somehow while I’ve been back and forth and away all these years, are grown ups! All my friends’ children have grown up. Imagine. And here we are, making new memories, making family!

The sweetness of life is in many things. These tiny things, the treasure of having these tiny moments, with dear friends. The connection with you all.

(It’s also in big things. I just found out that I have had a workshop accepted for a conference this fall. I’ll be exploring the Five Fold Goddess of Peace with Kelly Himmsl Arthur of Thinkpeace Workshops for Girls. Oh my!)

Time to inhale and exhale, with lots of tiny, unimportant places to go.

Infrastructure and Peace, llvl

Train Travel – Day 2: Apparently, it’s not just the little corner of the world I’m inhabiting that’s having train problems. I heard from a FB friend that she got to add an extra 3 hours and different modes of travel to get home because there was a fire on the trains and the lines shorted out.

Now it’s true it’s the season of Stormy Weather… but it’s also true that there’s lots of infrastructure that isn’t being addressed… Train travel makes so much sense. It carries large numbers of us from here to there without anybody sitting down in their individual cars and smogging up the place…

But if they don’t work and you can’t rely on them… that’s a sad thing.

We need good infrastructure. And quite frankly trains make life so much easier. When my Swedish sisters were at my wedding, the guy running the space wanted to know if Sweden was a modern country. What do you mean, they wondered. It was his opinion if they still rode trains, it wasn’t modern. (well, we joked yesterday, that perhaps he was right…) we were all confused. Nothing more modern than a country that takes its people from one place without lots of smog.

But the system needs maintenance and repair and certain elements of the government think it costs too much. And don’t get confused, they’re not replacing roads… The air and the water in Sweden is so clear. It needs to be protected. Our air and water need to be improved. Taxes help!

So we had two very slow days getting from here to there after a fabulous weekend with family. And in between, they blew us to a lovely hotel because they messed up. But Lorraine’s son who was coming home last night was left standing for ours in a closed train station after the train stopped running. Eventually, his dad made a three-hour round trip to pick him up… And at last, we’re (all but one) safe and sound under their roof again.

I think I’ll leave a day or two early so I catch my train home! I was, as I say in the musing, much relieved when people were kind and considerate… and that was helped because the train line’s people were polite and effective… but still we have to believe in ourselves enough to invest. enough to demand investment…

Peace is expensive. And we must bear the cost. Waking Up and Stepping Up required…

And today is Tuesday… so a wonderful new picture will arrive from Deb Slade.

Farther from Peace, llvl

Yesterday, as you know, I waxed eloquent about your sweet support on social media about my friend’s kid. It was lovely for me, and his mom felt held as well. I’m sure that will support the entire family as they figure out how to move forward. Because of course there was more to the story… But love and safety? So important.

So there I am, swimming in a haze of well-being, and we hugged the family good-bye in Båstad and got on the train North. It was a little late, but oh, well.

But, an hour in, we found out there was an accident on the track and we’d have to get off and take a bus. As you can imagine it took a little bit to get the buses together to get a train full of people seated. It was Sunday, the last day of the national vacation. And eventually, the buses came and everyone got sorted out.

But the sorting out process reminded me why we struggle with conflicts. This was so little. There would be buses for everyone. We were all inconvenienced. By the time this happened, we had already missed our train. And that’s what is, we miss the train.

But people went crazy. “I paid good money for this.” (um, we all did.) “I have missed my train connection.” (um, we all did.) “I have someplace I have to be tomorrow. It’s very important.” (um, we all have someplace to be, and if it’s really important, you don’t take the last bus on the Sunday vacation ends…)

But it wasn’t just the posturing. it was the chaos and the shouting. All I could think was people in Palestine are having their houses bombed. (apparently the Israelis will tell you, we’re bombing your house in 10 minutes. Get out.) People ran over small children and old people to find their place on the bus. Hello, this is Sweden, there will be plenty of buses, it will just take time. It wasn’t really scary, but you paid attention. And there was lots of eye-rolling over the more blatant shows of spleen.

But, it was a bus and train connections. And there was such ill-will. How can we hope to solve real problems if, at the first personal inconvenience, we turn into a mob… (and yes, the train station would have done well to have some personnel there, but still.) Did I step up and organize people into lines? no. Actually considered it, but my swedish is not all that fluent…

We all got on the buses. We had to spend the night in G-burg in a lovely hotel with lovely, lovely, lovely mangled (big iron) sheets and a great breakfast buffet. We went out for dinner and had a beer. And talked. Because that’s what Lorraine and I do. I was grateful to not be alone… but it was just one more lovely day on my amazing summer adventure!

All we are saying… is please, could you please, give Peace a chance? and relax. My aunt used to say: What would you do if you had real problems? One only has to look to the evening news to figure that out.

Swedish Sabbath Peace, llvl

This morning there is indeed Sabbath Peace in our hearts. Lorraine’s son called her about 11 last evening. He’d just seen his aunt’s post on Facebook. Her son was missing. He’d fought with his parents and stormed off. He was drinking, they knew that. He can’t drink on the medications he’s on, they knew that. He hadn’t shown up the evening before for an 11 o’clock meet at a concert.

What to do, what to do? They called. They posted on FB. People shared. His sister and her friends shared. The rest of us just hoped and prayed and willed best outcomes. But people came forward to comfort and to reassure. It’s happened to me, I’ve had that fear; yet it was ok.

Most of the time it is ok… but sometimes it isn’t. But there you were, willing to take a moment to think about a young man you’ll never meet and a frantic mom and dad. To hold your friend who holds her friends. Community, with the loosest of connections, but stepping up to be community.

So today, because of where I am and because of who you are, I’m counting blessings and giving thanks. For all the places we miss the mark, there are plenty where the arrow flies true. Thanks for being those well aimed friends. Love, it’s for everyone. Peace lies in our hands, which today were very capable. We must remember how capable we are!

Exchange Student Peace, llvl

I still remember the day I left and the day I came home. August 5. June 13. On either end, I spent two weeks with the other exchange students; the first two studying Swedish, the last two touring Europe. But in between, a life-changing year.

My world was changed beyond recognition. At seventeen, you assume the whole world is what you know. This was such a gentle way to understand how much bigger the world really is. My understanding of culture, politics, religion and love exploded and never fit back into the same box.

I was lucky, no doubt about that. The family was great. My Mama was a great second mama. And she was seasoned. She’d already sent one child off and had one child in. She’d send off 3 more. But we were a great fit. 40 years later I was privileged to do her memorial. Two of her girls, my Swedish sisters, would come to my wedding. And later to my sister’s memorial. Family was created and then it was nurtured.

And so the first part of my stay with them was at this summer house that I’m staying in now. Two of the sisters I met that first day were together yesterday. We went to lunch with my friend Lorraine. And we laughed. And ate. And looked at glorious scenery. And visited the garden where Mama’s and Papa’s ashes were interred.

These women have taught me to look for sisters and for friends in unlikely places. The boundaries between us were not large. But when you’re taking first steps, that’s a good thing… Peace is made up of small steps. Love and laughter and food ease the way. Beautiful views can help. So? off we go… more Peace. More Laughter. More Food. More glorious Nature!

Giggling Peace, llvl

One of the fun things about visiting Lorraine is realizing I’m still a teenager in side. When I first came to Sweden, back in 1969, we would sit at this cafe on the square in our little town and laugh. Swedes are many things, but boisterous is not part of the national character in the normal course of the day. (Remember that at the same time I was laughing out loud, I was also learning to curtsey as I walked by my elders — if you can imagine that!)

So Lorraine and I were always having to catch ourselves up from being giddy 17-year-old American girls and trying to fit in — because at seventeen, who wants to do anything other than fit in?

But there we were, laughing through the train (because for some reason our train door didn’t open, so we had to walk through two cars to get to our seats. And laughter doesn’t stop because you walk through a door — even when the door says: Quiet!

And of course being icily told to be quiet just meant that we were going to choke on our giggles. There are times to be serious, and I have a lot of them, but even in the serious times, I’m often laughing! Because even in the worst of situations there’s stuff that’s just funny.

I like that I still can be reprimanded for having too much fun. (And really, the train was 15 minutes away from leaving the station, and it’s a train not a library and we did quiet down!) I also like that I no longer can be made to feel uncomfortable because I’m laughing out loud.

Peace… it’s in the loud, boisterous moments as well as the tender quiet ones!

And as I said as I put my message out today, it’s odd that I can feel like a giggly teenager and still have someone rush to help me with my suitcases, because, oh, right, I’m gray-haired! Although, in my defense, I’m well able to handle my suitcases, even if i insist in taking too much stuff wherever I go!

Peace, my friends, I wish you light giggles and deep belly laughs (although not in the quiet car!) I wish you happy times with dear, dear friends. Keep making new memories and keep holding the old ones sacred. Inviting people into that sweet space is a wonderful way to spread Peace, bit by bit!

Everyday Peace, llvl

Well, I’m off again today, this time to visit Cecilia. Lorraine and I get on the train in just a few hours. But before we left, I had this lovely slow day catching up on things, doing things that are completely Ann… writing my blog, writing a musing, prepping some weddings. A sweet, sweet day.

Even with fun, you have to take a pause once in a while and come back to self. It’s fun to recognize how very much I like my life and my work. And even with fun, once in a while you have to stop…

And stopping in a garden full of flowers, friendship and writing? that’s pretty heavenly!

I’m not sure when I’ll be back to this… can you imagine, people a) have summer homes and b) don’t always have wifi in them. And that, means going with the flow! Peace. It arrives in so many packages. We have to keep sampling, until we find it. Well, by Monday, certainly.

And we have to keep finding new ways to work on Peace, because what we’re doing isn’t edging the world forward, is it…

Peace and Paradise, disturbed, llvl

Asch. We are who we are. And life is as we know it. Sometimes that’s amazing. Sometimes it’s less so.

Yesterday was filled with both. Lorraine’s sister and her daughter came to visit. Hooray. We packed down a watermelon and a gooseberry/black current pie/raspberry (oooh, my!) and took the ferry boat from the Picasso sculpture (yes i sorta took a picture, some time I’ll figure out how to put my reeeeeeally mediocre pics on Facebook… oh, thank goodness for Deb Slade and her art shots!) over to the island.

Once we got to the rocks on the other side of the island, it was amazing. You could dive off the rocks into the lake and bob and float and laugh and we did! Apparently there are rules: two dips in the lake and then you can drink your coffee or tea. No drinking tea if your eyelashes aren’t damp!

It was just lovely. You can’t believe the amount of stuff we hauled out there to enjoy ourselves: chairs, towels, sunblock, thermoses, forks plates, knives, cutting boards, serving spoons. All for a trek through the woods. But make no mistake. Once again, it was Paradise!

But the niggling little problem about paradise is that I don’t walk well in the woods, particularly woods that are up and down with stones and roots. And roots covered over with springy, springy moss, which is beautiful and flowering. I’m not sure what triggered it, I had it fairly well controlled going out, but coming back to the boat, I realized I was having a panic attack. It was full blown before it broke my concentration, fast heart, fast shallow breathing, threatening tears. Once I realized, I could ask Lorraine to go more slowly, and to be patient. It wasn’t so much help I needed as time. It’s frustrating, because it’s really beautiful in the woods… intellectually I know that. But if you’ve ever had panic attacks, you know it just takes a lot of concentration and slow exhalations to calm them. And understanding friends. I had all that, but whew. Unreasoning fear, from out of nowhere.

Exhale, inhale, exhale, inhale. one foot, two foot. (ah, why didn’t Dr. Seuss write a book about dealing with panic attacks? It’s exactly what you need… silly, mindless repetition.

But we got to the boat on time and the ferry was waiting. Wonderful old wooden boat to take us back to the mainland, laughing all the way. But sheesh, wanna know if like having all my insecurities on display, in front of beloved friends (and who better?), no, not so much. Hard work. Great Payoff…

And yet, it was Paradise. There was Peace. There was nothing more beautiful than, not only the rocks, but the journey out and in. I think I’ll try it again. (Poor them! Lucky me!)

Sweet, Summer Peace Days, llvl

I’m having the loveliest time… So many sweet summer days in a row, “no particular place to go…”

Although today we do, Lorraine’s sister Dorothy and her daughter Sigrid are coming and we’re taking the “banana boat” over to the island and going to Kjell and Lorraine’s favorite rocks on the island. Lunch is coming along. Swimming will ensue. It’s only going to be mid 70s today, but the water’s still warm… ahhhhhh. And it’s nice because there’s a rigamarole attached to it. Drive to the boat. Stand in line. Ride to the island (we’re on the Vanern Lake now, the large, large lake in central Sweden, Karlstad is the closest town that’s usually visible on the map, but we’re in Kristinehamn.) Then it’s a 20 minute walk through the woods to get to where we’re going. (that’s the scary part for me… my balance, my balance!) and then out onto the warm, warm rocks that slope into the sea. yay! Everyday’s a holiday.

Yesterday there was dinner with a well known Swedish filmmaker… small art films, not big commercial ones. Gunvor Nelson lives in the same Artists Area in K’hamn that Lorraine and Kjell do. (There’s a print of her house in the snow, done by Kjell that hangs in my office). Pizza. yum. Really, it’s a perfect vacation, lots of eating, lots of swimming, lots of talking to beloved friends and visiting beloved places.

And so I’m reading and enjoying life. Writing a little. And at the same time, fretting a little because after all… There’s a war on and my friend Sonia’s family is at risk. But I guess my prayers from here are carried as well as they might be if i were at home. It’s a very frightening time we live in. As Pope Francis, quickly becoming beloved, said: No more war! No more War! No more War!

Sacred Village

Building a World of Peace, Village by Sacred Village.

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