Parental Peace

I was so lucky to be able to come back home in my 50s and be together with my parents in their last years. I came back in 2002. Daddy died in 2008 and Mommie in 2010. I worked as their aide and caretaker for a lot of that time. It was lovely.

My parents were married for 65 years. They were sweethearts still. But they were very different from one another, and In this time I got to know them both better. Daddy was more mobile and we read together and dined out. And in the way of old folks we went to the doctors a lot. Life is what it is, isn’t it…

But earlier, Sam was an involved community citizen. He was on the School Board, the Municipal Board, the Boards that started the Day Care Center and the Women’s Center. Oh, right, he was an Evans. He was on the Swimming Pool Board. He was a Deacon, a Trustee and an Elder at his church (don’t ask me the difference, it’s all so confusing!) and also served regionally. He visited people in the hospital.

I learned from him. I learned it’s not scary to visit in the hospital or to hang with someone who is dying. I learned to step up and step in. I’m not a committee person, but I am an activist. It’s a challenge, because in activism you have to sustain the momentum yourself. But it’s worth it!

So what a lucky girl I am. Two wonderful parents. Nurses at home loved my parents. They loved Betty as we all did because she was talented and charming. But they longed to know Sam. As one woman said… He was a good father, wasn’t he? (The best.) I wish I’d had a good father. (He’s here for the using. It’s never too late to have a good dad.)

He wasn’t that playful, laughing Daddy. But he was a good and thoughtful man who loved us unconditionally. And he taught us by example and explicitly to be good people. And then he was proud as punch of us. I know how lucky that makes me.

I know that there is Peace in my world because of both of them and because I knew I was well loved. I hope there is love in your world, too. I hope you are the love in your world. Peace be with us all. Now more than ever, may we be Peace.


Surprise! There’s a Camera in my Bedroom!

Dear Bartender and Priestess,

I was raised Catholic, and my parents and I go to church semi-regularly. I am 19 years old and in college, and still live with my parents. Recently, I learned something that’s kind of freaking me out and I don’t know what to do. Continue reading