This mourning thing is curious. At the same time your life is unraveling, it’s being knitted up again in new ways. Life reforms. Arms open and then close around you. People do stupid silly things with you and for you. You go through the list and get things done. And I’ve actually accomplished great piles of things. And soon will have a bit better handle on things needing to be done, thank the All That Is.
Everything’s out of season right now. It should not be this warm. Even while I enjoy the weather, I worry about what it means. And that’s another weird thing about mourning. You don’t stop making associations and connections — or at least you don’t all the time. Sometimes the brain really works and then you fret about global warming for a bit.
And today, lots of things worked. My cousin and I got to hug and mourn. We got to drink and laugh. My cousin whom I knew not very well at all growing up, but who looks like me. My cousin whom I got to know very well, because I married her to her husband.
For Life, Love, Hope, Peace are all there even when things are bleak. And occasionally they manage to shine through the cloud that sometimes hangs over your head and sometimes is held there so you don’t have to face the world — even the wonderful things can seem overwhelming. But there they are. Steadfast companions. And sooner or later you know, you’ll be back on the Peace Road. Changed… maybe even transformed. Tired. But Steadfast too. Because that is what you are called to be.